Ok, so I'm behind on the updates, but that's ok, because it mostly brings good news.
I ended up hearing from the cardiologist on Wednesday. He confirmed that the baby has a complete AV canal defect. The hole is still there, its between the lower chambers of the heart (if I remember correctly from the u/s) and its still going to need surgery to fix it. Here's the good news. He recommends surgery between 3 and 9 months old. If all keeps going in the direction its going, he sees no risk to me delivering in the hospital of our choice when I go into labor on my own and bringing the baby home in about the same timeline as a healthy baby gets to come home. We'll obviously have to keep monitoring this to make sure there are NO risks to the baby and we will have to also do echocardiograms (heart u/s) to assess the baby's heart after birth, but its looking good SO FAR. (I can't stress that enough, everything is still up in the air for now. SO FAR is the best I can offer until we are about 6-10 weeks further into the pregnancy). He also said that he has rarely had to repeat the surgery so one shot and we should be all good to go. Its still open heart surgery and obviously there are still MAJOR risks (infection, the repair doesn't take, heart doesn't restart, etc), but knowing that there is rarity in repeat surgeries is a good thing. I'm still able to see my OB (she's closer, I know and trust her, and she's communicating everything back and forth with the clinic and the hospital) and still able to do all the routine stuff there in Little Falls. We still have monthly appointments in St Cloud and might have some more appointments with the cardiologist (hopefully he'll be there this time!), but its all looking like the prayers are working in our favor.
I can't say it enough. THANK YOU for your prayers. Please keep praying as I feel its having some effect. And its also nice to know that there are people out there thinking of us and wishing for the best outcome possible. Thanks be to all the people out there who have taken to praying, good thoughts, and best wishes. But I can't thank everyone and leave out God for his part. God, you already know how this is all going to play out, but I thank you for your blessing of this beautiful baby growing inside and the blessing of good drs and good news. I pray that you continue to bless us and give us an amazing outcome for this journey. We trust in you, believe in your miracles, and are eternally thankful that you have done so much for us so far. I can never thank you enough for what you have given us.
Now, I want to address something before it gets out of hand. Yes, there is still a chance this baby could have Down's. I've never made a secret of it and yes, I do have some fears with this probability. I want to come out and say it to anyone who thinks otherwise. Adam and I are NOT upset that there is a chance for Down's. The Down's is such a minimal worry of ours. We don't worry about the condition itself, we worry about the complications that can and often do come with it like bowel obstructions, heart problems, fluid in the lungs, mental restrictions, and of course how the world will treat our miracle, should it come out with Down's. I have had comments made to me about the Downs that disturb me and I've done what I felt best at the time to address those comments. No, we obviously won't terminate at any time if Downs becomes a certainty. We won't freak out over what could come our way with this condition. I want others to understand that Down's is NOT a horrible thing. I'd have a lot more issues coming to terms with a condition like spina bifida, autism, cerebral palsy, or anything else that is totally life altering. Those conditions take a lot of work (all of them do, really) and in some cases, their condition will mean a shortened life span.
For now, our focus is on the baby's heart, watching for bowel problems, keeping an eye on the fluid around the lungs, and any other complications. Let's leave the future in the future and not worry about what we don't know just yet. Let's not start worrying about quality of life because of the possibility of a condition like Down's. Its not even a for sure thing and we aren't worried about that. The other health risks that come with it, of course we worry about those. But let's not start worrying about the other crap. Let's focus the good energy on the baby and making sure we are doing all we can and praying for the things we have no control over.
We have another appointment next Wednesday in Little Falls with our regular OB and at that appointment, we'll be addressing the pains in my belly (painful Braxton Hicks?), the sciatic problems, and all the other discomforts that I don't remember from last time. Since it wasn't really made an issue at the appointment in St Cloud, we'll make sure our OB checks us out head to toe on that.
I also have my Glucose Tolerance test coming up. I don't mind the test itself, really. When I was pregnant with Anthony, I believe I was told to not eat anything from about midnight on until after the appointment, but I was allowed all the water I wanted. Yay. Starve a pregnant woman. Never a good idea. Well, good news this time is I just can't eat anything super sweet in the hours leading up to the appointment (which is a morning appointment so I won't suffer long). I don't mind the stuff you have to drink. To me, its like a more concentrated orange soda. I have heard horror stories of it being flat, no taste, thick, warm, and there being a LOT of it to drink. I guess I got off scott free last time because mine was ICE cold (YAY!) and I didn't think it was a lot to drink (you have like 5-10 mins to slam about 8-10 oz I believe), wasn't thick, and tasted like super sweet orange soda. Now, the effect on Anthony was CRAZY! He went NUTS! He became a super hyper little turkey. Kicking, punching, wiggling, spinning, and stretching the whole time until the sugar wore off. HOLY CRAP it was nuts. I know this baby won't be any different (well, maybe more hyper) but we'll see. This baby goes crazy over a little bit of chocolate, so we'll have to hang on tight and see how we handle it. The worst part of the whole test (in my eyes) is a tie between the fasting before and the blood draw. UGH, I HATE needles. I hate seeing them go into my skin, I hate seeing them in my skin, I hate the thought. Distract me the best you can. I also hated having that IV in my hand when I gave birth to Anthony, so you can imagine how thrilled I am when they have to draw blood (or for the IV for the delivery!). Oh well, its all for a healthier baby, so I'll do it. Anything for my kids.
And what kind of mom would I be if I didn't put on some stuff about Anthony. The kid is growing FAST. He's stretching into a lot more of his 18 month stuff and now weighs about 22 lbs. I would say the 23 that the scale said, but he had a wet diaper on when we weighed him. The diapers are about .5 to a full lb when fully wet, so he loses credit for that.
And the personality has grown EVEN MORE! I didn't think it was possible! We had apartment inspections this past week so we had to make sure the apartment was looking good and they could get their inspections done without incident. Anthony took the opportunity to embrace the empty living room (void of the toys EVERYWHERE) and started really using his ride on toys. The kid is crazy! He makes the car noises when he's cruising along on his sit n scoot, rides Leo the Lion while slapping Leo's nose (it makes his nose light up and he sings and makes noise), and he throws his balls all over. I got him on of those bigger playground balls that isn't as big as a yoga ball, but its bigger than the regular playground balls. I came in the door, handed the ball to the kid, and he took off running with it in his arms and totally ditched saying welcome home to me. He then played with it for the next 2 hours before bed. He threw it around, tried to lay on top of it, kicked it, played catch with us (mostly the ball just bounced off his head, but he loved it), and wouldn't let it far out of his sight. He'd get up on the couch with the ball, sit down like a big boy, then throw the ball off the couch and go chase after it. He has NEVER played with just one toy so intensely before. He couldn't even be distracted by a sippy! I got the idea to get this ball after MaryAnne had one at her house when we had her watching Anthony. He did the same thing with the one at their house. Carried it around, threw it, kicked it, climbed on top, the whole nine. So, that was probably the best $3 toy that I've bought him yet! Its so cute to watch him try so hard to climb on top of it, lay on his belly on top, and then suddenly the ball rolls out from underneath him and he goes flying in one direction or another to the floor. He always looks up at us and smiles and goes back for more. Gotta love the drive this kid has. Does NOT give up at all.
I've noticed more words. Me thinks its time to watch my language as he's saying an S word that sounds like a naughty word, but he also could be saying Sit. He also has started saying Boo (BUH!) when playing peek a boo. He'll say it in hopes that you say it soon after and giggles like a fiend when you do say it back. He knows what a banana is and seems to be saying nanana. This could be a form of him saying neh neh like he used to when he was hungry, but we'll have to see where nanana ends up going. He also seems to be catching on to "What's this?" (wah dis), and in return, we will tell him what he's pointing to or what he has in his hand. He seems to love this game. He doesn't say it often, but he will acknowledge that you told him what the object is. His Bah (Ball) is coming along well too. He likes the kind of balls that have the little spikes on them. He really likes it when its of a smaller size and we can roll it all over his head, chest, legs, and belly while saying Ball!. He'll bust out laughing and start saying Tika Tika! (Tickle tickle). He'll even walk up to one of us and say Tika Tika! and we'll take it upon ourselves to start nibbling his ribs or blowing on his belly to tickle him while saying Tickle tickle! Oh how he loves that. He'll laugh until he's breathless. He has gotten back to saying Mama and dada with an occasional papa. Adam likes Papa more than Dada, but papa seems to be more work. Anthony does know that Papa and dada are the same person at least!
Anthony also recognizes the sound that the shower makes when you are flipping the lever for the shower and turning off the water. He starts laughing and gasping his OOOOO! in anticipation for a little peek a boo with the shower curtain. This is often when he'll start saying BUH! Buh! in hopes of telling us he wants to play peek a boo. Who can say no when he asks like that? He sometimes recognizes the car (the muffler is falling off again) and knows that his papa is in the parking lot, but he ALWAYS knows the sound of the keys in the lock. He'll go RACING (no kidding, full speed run) down the hallway to get to the door. Once we have the door unlocked, we'll pop it open just enough that he can pull it the rest of the way open and let you in. But he doesn't just let you in, he grabs your leg and PULLS you in. Many times he'll take off running into the hallway once he has you in the door. If he doesn't take off, he's amazing at closing the door. He really doesn't like an open door at all. He'll pull everyone in the same room and close the door. This past Wednesday, Adam was getting ready for work (he closes every other Wed. so he goes in later) and Anthony wouldn't let Adam leave the bedroom. He kept chasing Adam down, pulling him in the bedroom, and closing the door. Finally, Adam managed to get out the bedroom door and had to grab a gate to lock himself into the bathroom away from the little turkey. You can imagine that this didn't sit well with Anthony. He was very conflicted on what to do. He tried to chase Adam down, but seeing the gate, he knew he couldn't get to his papa. So he would start closing the bedroom door, but then thought otherwise and opened it again. He went back and forth for about 5 mins until he decided the door needed to be closed and slammed it shut. He also doesn't like being ushered out into the hallway so we can put up the gate and go into the living room. He'll scream bloody murder and its hard to get him refocused on going and playing in the living room to start the day. And yes, he climbs the gates. He'll throw things over the gate to have the excuse to start climbing. And yes, he has gotten over the gate. He ended up almost cracking his head open while I was doing dishes one day. Doesn't stop him from trying though!
We've been working on taking down the barricade so he has more room to run, which makes for more work for us since that is what keeps him out of the dvd tower, the dining room table, the garbage, and the kitchen. He knows where he can squeeze his scrawny self through and get into the kitchen, but luckily, he gets so excited, he makes a ton of noise and we figure out whats up pretty fast.
He's really gotten into facial expressions even more too. That kid can give a MEAN side eye (I do this to him as my evil eye and to tell him I mean business) and he's copied my gasp. He'll do a deep intake of air while doing his OOOOOO!!! face and then when I bust out laughing, he scrunches his whole face up and laughs like a little fiend. Its the funniest thing ever. He also does the gasp and giggle as I give him each section of his daily orange. Its like giving a kid the most prized of toys...that is, until he bites into that poor orange and brutally rips it apart, juices flying all over and dripping down his chin and chest. He loves his oranges. He'll eat a whole orange all by himself and gets REALLY upset if I steal any for myself. I bought strawberries the other day (OMG PERFECT color, size, and flavor!!) and he even gave me the side eyed look to get me to cut some up for him. Now, he likes his chocolate like any kid would (small amounts every once in a while unless I'm eating another cadbury egg...I get attacked!), but he LOVES his fresh fruit. Bananas, oranges, strawberries, mango, grapes, cantalope, berries, you name it. He'll eat it if it was frozen (and warmed), but he loves fresh. I think he likes the huge mess it makes all over. He's gotten more than one bath after a meal just because he was so sticky from the juice. But, since its something so healthy (and hasn't given him any issues at all!), who am I to deny him something he loves so much. He's still pretty keen on his veggies too. Mostly cut carrots and peas (ooo the squish!), but he'll eat just about any. He doesn't get much refined sugar, so he loves his produce. All the better, right?
Well, I'm going to head to bed. Its been quite the day today and I'm starting to feel REALLY stiff. Its going to take a little longer for me to get up and going for bed so I'm going to start now.
In the mean time, keep up the prayers and happy thoughts and keep checking back for more updates. I promise I'm going to try to get to a regular weekly posting. Things have just been chaotic. Possible teeth coming in again!
Friday, April 15, 2011
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
The kids!
Oh man, the kids are starting a little early with the sibling rivalry. I'll have Anthony on my chest (and belly) and the baby will start kicking and hitting right where Anthony is laying. Anthony then gets all worked up and sits back, then starts head butting and poking at my belly (mainly my belly button) as if to tell the baby to knock it off. He's still not happy that he can't lay on my chest like he used to, but he's getting used to having to put one leg on either side of my belly when he gives me his hugs and kisses. He sure does like giving the baby kisses too. Its so cute. He'll lean forward and kiss my belly button. But its not like a simple muah! quick peck. No, its an akward long kiss that often leaves a small bit of spit on my shirt or belly (depending if my shirt has been pulled up or not). He'll do this several times until I have to tell him "No more kisses for baby right now". He's just a little charmer!
He's taken a lot more to riding around on his toys that he's supposed to ride around on. The red Radio Flyer scooter we got for him for Christmas and Leo the lion (that he got from Debbie, Mike, Katrina, Kallie, and Great Grandma Rose) seem to be the favorites. He'll ride down the hall way smacking Leo's nose (which is the switch to play music and his nose lights up and he laughs) when it stops. Its the CUTEST thing ever. He's really catching on that he can ride on these, he just has to keep his feet going because they don't go on their own.
He also went pee in the potty for me once! I try to put him on the potty during diaper changes (its his no diaper time to prevent him from getting that nasty diaper butt) and he'll take things that are small enough and put them in the part of the potty that catches the business they make. Well, its usually the tub of diaper cream. This one particular day, he had shoved the tub in there and couldn't get it back out while he was sitting down. I thought I would help and was confused when I felt that the tub was wet. I had Anthony stand up while I pulled it out and saw a little pee in the pan/catcher thing. OMG he had PEED IN THE POTTY! I started in really heavy with the praise and could tell that he was just LOVING it! He was excited that he had done something so good (even if he had NO idea what it was!) and gave me the biggest grin he could. He hasn't done it since and I can tell that he really wants to do it again to get all the praise, but we are working on it. He really likes to sit on it, even if he has a diaper on. He also likes to play with the pan part. He'll carry it around, put it on his head, step in it, put toys in it, anything you can imagine. Might have to start breaking him of this little habit so he knows that its for pee, not toys. I wouldn't want him learning that he can put his toys in the toilet later on when he's moved on to that.
He's also taking on a few more words. They escape me now, but I'll start writing them down. I swear the other day he said done, thanks, please, and shoe. Of course in his little toddler way, but I swear that's what each sounded like. He loves his books and LOVES counting the monkeys and lady bugs in his two counting books. He won't let us close the book until he's counted them all. And he'll carry one of these books around the house for us to read during the day. I hope he's a little book worm like me! He's also loving going outside. Its still a little chilly so that full body bunting (Thanks for the idea, Shannon!) is PERFECT for him to go outside. It was the best $30 I've spent on an outer outfit for him. Its a burnt orange with these spikes on top that make him look like a dinosaur. He's just adorable in it and he loves that he can go outside and wander around in it. He still gets a little too excited when he's going outside and will tend to trip, but he's the kind of kid that gets right back up and goes for it again without a tear.
As for the baby and the pregnancy, the belly is getting huge and hard. If I eat a big meal, I look like I'm about to pop. This wasn't a good thing when we went to Olive Garden (OMG the soffatelli and chicken was AMAZING!) and I ate my heart out before we went to Old Navy to see if they had any pants for me. I was unable to get into a size 12, but the 14s were a bit snug and the 16s were pretty big. One pair made me look AMAZINGLY HUGE! I told Adam I looked like I was almost overdue, not 6 months pregnant! Of course he just smiles because he takes pride in the belly. Its kinda cute to see him with a puffed out chest when talking about the belly that's carrying his baby. I believe I've gained about 8 lbs so far. I don't think that's bad at all. I didn't drop much before, but at least I'm not in the double digits yet. The swelling has been pretty minimal so far and I'm still able to wear my rings. I hope I can until at least May when we have to get them inspected. Then I might put it away until after I deliver. We'll see though. Maybe it will get stuck and I'll have to wear it the whole time ;). Ok, so that wouldn't be the best, but I had to say it. I don't like being without my rings.
Baby is SO active! I often get kicked in the sides, lower pelvis where my pants sit, or way up high on the top. I've even been kicked up top and in the lower pelvis area at the same time. Judging from how we were situated on Monday, its quite possible we had one foot in each place and were trying to stretch for more room. Sorry, baby love. Its only going to get to be tighter as the time goes on! Adam is able to feel most of it, but its finally getting to where you can just barely see the movement from the outside.
I have been having some pains across the top of my belly. I can only describe them as maybe painful Braxton Hicks? The top third of my belly gets really hard, its a little harder to breathe, and it lasts for a little while. I made mention of it at the appointment, but no one said anything about it being of concern, so I'll just bring it up to the OB when I see her in about 2 weeks. She'll be able to sit with us and talk more about anything she sees one way or the other. I'm also thinking its time for that LOVELY glucose test. YAY. I actually don't mind it, but its how hyper the baby seems to get from the sudden sugar spike (and the fasting before). I'm not sure if I will be doing it this coming appointment, but I'm also not sure how often we'll be doing appointments. We are set up to go for monthly visits in St Cloud at the clinic there and our OB is basically working around them. Last time we saw her was obviously a month ago, but she said go ahead and wait 2 more weeks so that we aren't doing 2 appointments the same week.
But all seems to be going well. Belly is growing, Anthony is stretching out a bit more, we are getting a little more prepped for the new baby (we bought a box of size 1 huggies snugglers last week and have been packing up Anthony's clothes that no longer fit), and Adam and I are a little more relaxed with everything. I can tell he's getting excited to find out what we are going to be blessed with this time around. We still both have our idea of what we are having, but we aren't pushing either way. We often look at Anthony and think "OMG. In no time flat we'll have TWO kids. They'll probably BOTH be hyper little turds. We are SCREWED!" and then smile that nervous but happy smile. Eh, always an adventure with us!
Its been a fairly good stretch of days. We pray that it keeps up. Nice weather, healthy family, and all, what can be better?
He's taken a lot more to riding around on his toys that he's supposed to ride around on. The red Radio Flyer scooter we got for him for Christmas and Leo the lion (that he got from Debbie, Mike, Katrina, Kallie, and Great Grandma Rose) seem to be the favorites. He'll ride down the hall way smacking Leo's nose (which is the switch to play music and his nose lights up and he laughs) when it stops. Its the CUTEST thing ever. He's really catching on that he can ride on these, he just has to keep his feet going because they don't go on their own.
He also went pee in the potty for me once! I try to put him on the potty during diaper changes (its his no diaper time to prevent him from getting that nasty diaper butt) and he'll take things that are small enough and put them in the part of the potty that catches the business they make. Well, its usually the tub of diaper cream. This one particular day, he had shoved the tub in there and couldn't get it back out while he was sitting down. I thought I would help and was confused when I felt that the tub was wet. I had Anthony stand up while I pulled it out and saw a little pee in the pan/catcher thing. OMG he had PEED IN THE POTTY! I started in really heavy with the praise and could tell that he was just LOVING it! He was excited that he had done something so good (even if he had NO idea what it was!) and gave me the biggest grin he could. He hasn't done it since and I can tell that he really wants to do it again to get all the praise, but we are working on it. He really likes to sit on it, even if he has a diaper on. He also likes to play with the pan part. He'll carry it around, put it on his head, step in it, put toys in it, anything you can imagine. Might have to start breaking him of this little habit so he knows that its for pee, not toys. I wouldn't want him learning that he can put his toys in the toilet later on when he's moved on to that.
He's also taking on a few more words. They escape me now, but I'll start writing them down. I swear the other day he said done, thanks, please, and shoe. Of course in his little toddler way, but I swear that's what each sounded like. He loves his books and LOVES counting the monkeys and lady bugs in his two counting books. He won't let us close the book until he's counted them all. And he'll carry one of these books around the house for us to read during the day. I hope he's a little book worm like me! He's also loving going outside. Its still a little chilly so that full body bunting (Thanks for the idea, Shannon!) is PERFECT for him to go outside. It was the best $30 I've spent on an outer outfit for him. Its a burnt orange with these spikes on top that make him look like a dinosaur. He's just adorable in it and he loves that he can go outside and wander around in it. He still gets a little too excited when he's going outside and will tend to trip, but he's the kind of kid that gets right back up and goes for it again without a tear.
As for the baby and the pregnancy, the belly is getting huge and hard. If I eat a big meal, I look like I'm about to pop. This wasn't a good thing when we went to Olive Garden (OMG the soffatelli and chicken was AMAZING!) and I ate my heart out before we went to Old Navy to see if they had any pants for me. I was unable to get into a size 12, but the 14s were a bit snug and the 16s were pretty big. One pair made me look AMAZINGLY HUGE! I told Adam I looked like I was almost overdue, not 6 months pregnant! Of course he just smiles because he takes pride in the belly. Its kinda cute to see him with a puffed out chest when talking about the belly that's carrying his baby. I believe I've gained about 8 lbs so far. I don't think that's bad at all. I didn't drop much before, but at least I'm not in the double digits yet. The swelling has been pretty minimal so far and I'm still able to wear my rings. I hope I can until at least May when we have to get them inspected. Then I might put it away until after I deliver. We'll see though. Maybe it will get stuck and I'll have to wear it the whole time ;). Ok, so that wouldn't be the best, but I had to say it. I don't like being without my rings.
Baby is SO active! I often get kicked in the sides, lower pelvis where my pants sit, or way up high on the top. I've even been kicked up top and in the lower pelvis area at the same time. Judging from how we were situated on Monday, its quite possible we had one foot in each place and were trying to stretch for more room. Sorry, baby love. Its only going to get to be tighter as the time goes on! Adam is able to feel most of it, but its finally getting to where you can just barely see the movement from the outside.
I have been having some pains across the top of my belly. I can only describe them as maybe painful Braxton Hicks? The top third of my belly gets really hard, its a little harder to breathe, and it lasts for a little while. I made mention of it at the appointment, but no one said anything about it being of concern, so I'll just bring it up to the OB when I see her in about 2 weeks. She'll be able to sit with us and talk more about anything she sees one way or the other. I'm also thinking its time for that LOVELY glucose test. YAY. I actually don't mind it, but its how hyper the baby seems to get from the sudden sugar spike (and the fasting before). I'm not sure if I will be doing it this coming appointment, but I'm also not sure how often we'll be doing appointments. We are set up to go for monthly visits in St Cloud at the clinic there and our OB is basically working around them. Last time we saw her was obviously a month ago, but she said go ahead and wait 2 more weeks so that we aren't doing 2 appointments the same week.
But all seems to be going well. Belly is growing, Anthony is stretching out a bit more, we are getting a little more prepped for the new baby (we bought a box of size 1 huggies snugglers last week and have been packing up Anthony's clothes that no longer fit), and Adam and I are a little more relaxed with everything. I can tell he's getting excited to find out what we are going to be blessed with this time around. We still both have our idea of what we are having, but we aren't pushing either way. We often look at Anthony and think "OMG. In no time flat we'll have TWO kids. They'll probably BOTH be hyper little turds. We are SCREWED!" and then smile that nervous but happy smile. Eh, always an adventure with us!
Its been a fairly good stretch of days. We pray that it keeps up. Nice weather, healthy family, and all, what can be better?
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Wow, kinda a big waste...
But not really at the same time.
So, we had our 2 drs appointments on Monday. We were really anxious to get these over and done with because it meant we would be walking out with more answers and more knowledge. Little did we know, the day was going to be a LOT longer than we had planned. Thank God for family babysitting!
Day starts out with us dropping off Anthony to MaryAnne's house (CANNOT thank her enough for watching him!) and heading down to St Cloud hospital. I wasn't able to find the paperwork they had sent telling us what room we would be in, what doors to go in (this hospital is HUGE), and all I knew was the time to be there and the dr we were supposed to see. So, we planned on parking on the one side with the most spots and just hoofing it to where we needed to go. We went in door E and ended up having to walk to door B. Yay. I was out of breath, but just glad to be getting the day started. While waiting for them to call us in, Adam and I passed the time comparing what level of Angry Birds we were on. LOL I laugh because I didn't remember that the day before I had cranked the volume on my phone so that Anthony could play with the Toddler lock, scream, and still hear the music it was playing. WHOOPSIE! Sorry, other people!
We get called in and I get a gooey belly going on for the lady to do the echocardiogram. Basically, a ultrasound that is probably more high powered than the usual ones so they can see the baby's heart. The lady barely said anything the whole time and when she did talk, it was like talking to Captain Obvious. Yes, I know that looks like a blue candy cane and that looks like a red candy cane. I know you are checking out all the valves and vessels. Talk to me about something else too! The room was SO dark and the fans from the computer and the sonogram machine were just loud enough to make decent white noise. Mix that with a belly massage (she wasn't poking and prodding hard at all) and I'm in and out. Adam zonked out too. This lady had it about as dark as our bedroom at home. We never stood a chance (plus I don't think either one of us slept really good despite going to bed much earlier than normal). I kept having to flip and flop from side to side to my back to get a good view of certain parts of the heart.
Then I mention something about the small hole in the heart that we had been told about and she THEN takes the time to mention "Dr. Chip will be calling you at a later date after he's seen the pictures I get for the official diagnosis." Umm, EXCUSE ME?!?! I was told we would get to talk to him TODAY. WTF?!? She then tells me "He's got the day off because of a personal family emergency". Ok, I'll accept that (knowing it could be one of a MILLION things and I can't fault the guy for taking the day off if something major is going on. Adam and I were pretty upset that we wouldn't get to talk to him that day (mostly because Adam has to work the rest of the week and not knowing when the dr will call, we don't know if Adam will be there to hear what he has to say!), but we understood it as something beyond his control and tried to just cope. Well, my first appointment was at 10:30 at the hospital and the second was at 12:30 at the same clinic we went to last time. There's a few miles between and its going to be about lunch hour rush, but we thought "Eh, we'll be fine and maybe able to grab a bite between because this isn't supposed to take more than 90 mins" WRONG. This lady let us out shortly after 12 and we had JUST enough time to get back to the car, drive to the clinic, and check in there.
We did check in early, but you have to remember, I'm running on fumes (an apple, a banana, and some grape juice for each of us around 9), Adam is ready for at least a snack (and neither one of us wanted fast food), so we PRAYED this appointment didn't run long and we could get our stuff done and get some food. OMG Wrong again. Since we checked in early and they took us back early, we ended up having to wait about 15 mins for the ultrasound tech to come in and get us after the lpn did her thing with the weight, blood pressure, etc. This is where we were asked what dr we had seen at the hospital. When we mentioned we hadn't because Dr Chip was out, she mentioned that "Yea, he's out on a personal day. He found out on Thursday that him and his partner are able to adopt a baby. Today is the day they get to pick the baby up."
Wait. WHAT?!? Ok, we find issues with A LOT of this. Let me clarify first and foremost, we are happy that he was able to adopt a baby like they had been planning. Its an exciting time and we can't be upset with him for that. What we are pissed about is that he found out on Thursday about this going to be happening on Monday and NO ONE called us to reschedule or even let US know!! Kinda a big deal because we had a sheet FULL of questions we had written down to ask him! We wanted to get a diagnosis! We wanted to be together when we heard the news, not have to hear it over the phone whenever! Need I also remind you that adoptive parents are privy to the same rights as birth parents. They are able to get 6 weeks of leave to get everything settled with the baby. I'm not going to wait 6 friggin weeks to get news on my baby! Why weren't we told about this chink in the plans? We could have at least prepared, if not rescheduled for a time when he would be there. Again, NO hard feelings toward the Dr, and Congrats to him and his partner. His office should have pulled their heads out of their butts and told his appointments for that day that he wouldn't be in and we could figure out a better time to meet with him.
ANYWHO, we had to wait about 15-20 mins for the tech to come in because they took us back like RIGHT AWAY when we got there. Finally get the tech in and YAY!!! its the same lady! She was so awesome last time so I was feeling pretty good. You know the feeling. When you feel you can trust someone because they don't talk over your head with medical jargon, they laugh with you, you can crack a joke or two, they just make you COMFORTABLE.
She gets to measuring and makes sure to tell us to close our eyes in time (still team GREEN!) so we don't see any body parts we shouldn't, and takes all kinds of good pictures for us. I swear she's obsessed with profiles because she gave us a few of those, I believe. Really great lady about our age. Baby is measuring on target to about a week and a half ahead for some measurements. NOT a bad thing at all. The bigger (and most anyone will understand what I mean when I say this) the baby, the better they fair when it comes to health issues. You don't want a smaller baby to have to deal with some bigger issues. Baby behaved and EVERYTHING so she was able to get her share of the appointment done fairly easily and then stepped out to get the dr and compare the measurements from last time to this time. She left me all goopy just in case the dr wanted to do a few scans of his own. 30 mins passes. No dr.
45 mins passes, still no dr, but Cassie (the tech) checks in and lets us know we haven't been forgotten and that if we need the bathroom or whatever to go for it.
60 mins pass, no dr.
I kid you not, Cassie ended up checking in on us like 3-4 times. Each time apologizing for the wait and letting us know we haven't been forgotten, the dr is just in with another patient. Ok, that's fine I guess. What else can we really do except wait?
90 freaking minutes pass and STILL NO DOCTOR. Ok, this is stupid. First appointment we don't get to talk to the dr because his office staff have their heads in the clouds and aren't thinking of the people who had planned (and made appointments JUST SO they could speak to the dr!), and now we have to wait an HOUR AND A HALF for the dr to NOT show up and talk to us. I understand he's a busy man, but he couldn't even be bothered to tell the nurses how much longer he would be with this other patient. Mind you, its 2 pm. Neither one of us had eaten, we are stuck in a room with no tv or anything like that, no food, and no information. We were pretty pissed off. Luckily Cassie came in and told us since we had been waiting so long, they were going to comp us for our time. We took the cafeteria comp and got some food. OMG it felt so good just to have the friggin food in my hands. I was starting to shake, I was so starved!
We knew that once we got back up to the floor we had just come from that they would probably call us back right away because that's just how it ALWAYS happens. Sure enough, they call us back, but this time they take us to a room and the lpn sets up for the dr to show us something on the computer and tells us he should be in shortly. I'm half way through my pretzel when he FINALLY shows up (like 2:30 or so for crying out loud!!!). He said he had just gotten off the phone with the lady from the hospital and was going to talk to us about what she had found and what Cassie had taken photos of.
Basically, no NEW news. Which is a good thing because its not more bad news, just more of the same, things we had learned from research, or a glimmer of good news. Join me as I recall it.
The hole in the baby's heart puts us in the category of a complete endocardial cushion defect. Pretty big news, but the hole is not big. Still won't heal on its own, but its not like I had pictured in my mind. Surgery is still needed, but if we keep on this track (its too soon to tell one way or the other, we are cautiously hopeful), we won't need surgery right away. We will keep up with our monthly visits with this dr so he can keep monitoring the progress that is or isn't being made. We are encouraged to keep up our regular appointments in Little Falls (THANK GOD ABOVE!!) and its looking hopeful (keep that word in mind, its HOPEFUL) that we can deliver on our own (Go into labor on naturally) in Little Falls (same hospital and dr we had for Anthony, GREAT dr and nurses!) and quite possibly be able to go home in a reasonable time frame without extra equipment (ie, oxygen, monitors, etc). Of course this is ALL depending on what we see at weeks 32 and 36. We can't make any for sure plans and have to keep it in our minds that delivering in the Cities still could happen. Nothing is for sure either way right now.
They are looking at the possibility that there could be underlying issues that we just can't see yet. There is also still a chance that the baby has downs (which carries certain health risks too), but we can't be sure until baby is here. With downs, there is a chance for bowel problems (obstructions around the duodenum, fixable with a fairly simple surgery) and the fluid around the lungs needs to be monitored too just in case it could lead to issues with baby's lungs. Again, too soon to tell.
But a fair amount of news that left us feeling a small weight lifting. We had some answers and some answers for now (we'll have to revisit some questions, obviously), but nothing was really upsetting. We were warned that baby very well might end up being born small (babies with heart problems typically are), and that is a big reason as to why they are going to try and let us get to full term and go into labor on our own, as long as there is NO risk to the baby. Heaven forbid they see ANY risk to the baby, its time to take the baby before I would go into labor on my own. Obviously the bigger the baby, the better they do on the outside, so that's why they are going to let us go as long as its safe. That was comforting, since I was having fears that they would have to FOR SURE take the baby sooner (our OB thought they could possibly take the baby 1-2 weeks early) or that I would FOR SURE have to be induced.
Now, it might seem that we are being left to hang in the wind, but we really aren't. The defect is still there, nothing has really changed, we just got more info and some things got cleared up for us. We had basically started to accept the worst case scenario where I would have to deliver early in the Cities, surgery very well could be right away, I'd be induced, baby would be sick from the start (low pulse Oxygen numbers) and I would have to stay down in the Cities for at least a week, spending time away from family and ESPECIALLY my boys. But now we have more possibilities reopened for us. We don't know anything for sure and won't for about 8 weeks or so, but at least we have been reassured that so far, so good. No changes that put anyone on alert YET. There's still time for things to pop up for us, but for now, all is good. Baby looks healthy, moves a lot, and is measuring just where we want.
Now we just need to hear from that pediatric cardiologist Dr Chip. Pray he calls tomorrow when Adam gets home. I'd really like to have Adam here so we can all talk together.
I'll update more on the pregnancy and Anthony in the next post. For now, I'm going to go chill on the couch for a little bit. Please keep praying and take heart, I think that its working in the sense that we have NO MORE BAD NEWS for now. I do feel I can let loose a few happy tears.
Thank you, God. We appreciate your gift and don't take for granted its size. We are thankful for no bad news and a glimmer of cautious hope. We pray that you keep your hands on our family and keep them all safe and healthy. We also pray for more progress and no more health issues with the baby. As for the other things I pray for, I continue praying. I won't say it here, but you know what I ask for in my heart. I pray it all in your name and give MANY thanks to you!
Amen! Hallelujah!!
So, we had our 2 drs appointments on Monday. We were really anxious to get these over and done with because it meant we would be walking out with more answers and more knowledge. Little did we know, the day was going to be a LOT longer than we had planned. Thank God for family babysitting!
Day starts out with us dropping off Anthony to MaryAnne's house (CANNOT thank her enough for watching him!) and heading down to St Cloud hospital. I wasn't able to find the paperwork they had sent telling us what room we would be in, what doors to go in (this hospital is HUGE), and all I knew was the time to be there and the dr we were supposed to see. So, we planned on parking on the one side with the most spots and just hoofing it to where we needed to go. We went in door E and ended up having to walk to door B. Yay. I was out of breath, but just glad to be getting the day started. While waiting for them to call us in, Adam and I passed the time comparing what level of Angry Birds we were on. LOL I laugh because I didn't remember that the day before I had cranked the volume on my phone so that Anthony could play with the Toddler lock, scream, and still hear the music it was playing. WHOOPSIE! Sorry, other people!
We get called in and I get a gooey belly going on for the lady to do the echocardiogram. Basically, a ultrasound that is probably more high powered than the usual ones so they can see the baby's heart. The lady barely said anything the whole time and when she did talk, it was like talking to Captain Obvious. Yes, I know that looks like a blue candy cane and that looks like a red candy cane. I know you are checking out all the valves and vessels. Talk to me about something else too! The room was SO dark and the fans from the computer and the sonogram machine were just loud enough to make decent white noise. Mix that with a belly massage (she wasn't poking and prodding hard at all) and I'm in and out. Adam zonked out too. This lady had it about as dark as our bedroom at home. We never stood a chance (plus I don't think either one of us slept really good despite going to bed much earlier than normal). I kept having to flip and flop from side to side to my back to get a good view of certain parts of the heart.
Then I mention something about the small hole in the heart that we had been told about and she THEN takes the time to mention "Dr. Chip will be calling you at a later date after he's seen the pictures I get for the official diagnosis." Umm, EXCUSE ME?!?! I was told we would get to talk to him TODAY. WTF?!? She then tells me "He's got the day off because of a personal family emergency". Ok, I'll accept that (knowing it could be one of a MILLION things and I can't fault the guy for taking the day off if something major is going on. Adam and I were pretty upset that we wouldn't get to talk to him that day (mostly because Adam has to work the rest of the week and not knowing when the dr will call, we don't know if Adam will be there to hear what he has to say!), but we understood it as something beyond his control and tried to just cope. Well, my first appointment was at 10:30 at the hospital and the second was at 12:30 at the same clinic we went to last time. There's a few miles between and its going to be about lunch hour rush, but we thought "Eh, we'll be fine and maybe able to grab a bite between because this isn't supposed to take more than 90 mins" WRONG. This lady let us out shortly after 12 and we had JUST enough time to get back to the car, drive to the clinic, and check in there.
We did check in early, but you have to remember, I'm running on fumes (an apple, a banana, and some grape juice for each of us around 9), Adam is ready for at least a snack (and neither one of us wanted fast food), so we PRAYED this appointment didn't run long and we could get our stuff done and get some food. OMG Wrong again. Since we checked in early and they took us back early, we ended up having to wait about 15 mins for the ultrasound tech to come in and get us after the lpn did her thing with the weight, blood pressure, etc. This is where we were asked what dr we had seen at the hospital. When we mentioned we hadn't because Dr Chip was out, she mentioned that "Yea, he's out on a personal day. He found out on Thursday that him and his partner are able to adopt a baby. Today is the day they get to pick the baby up."
Wait. WHAT?!? Ok, we find issues with A LOT of this. Let me clarify first and foremost, we are happy that he was able to adopt a baby like they had been planning. Its an exciting time and we can't be upset with him for that. What we are pissed about is that he found out on Thursday about this going to be happening on Monday and NO ONE called us to reschedule or even let US know!! Kinda a big deal because we had a sheet FULL of questions we had written down to ask him! We wanted to get a diagnosis! We wanted to be together when we heard the news, not have to hear it over the phone whenever! Need I also remind you that adoptive parents are privy to the same rights as birth parents. They are able to get 6 weeks of leave to get everything settled with the baby. I'm not going to wait 6 friggin weeks to get news on my baby! Why weren't we told about this chink in the plans? We could have at least prepared, if not rescheduled for a time when he would be there. Again, NO hard feelings toward the Dr, and Congrats to him and his partner. His office should have pulled their heads out of their butts and told his appointments for that day that he wouldn't be in and we could figure out a better time to meet with him.
ANYWHO, we had to wait about 15-20 mins for the tech to come in because they took us back like RIGHT AWAY when we got there. Finally get the tech in and YAY!!! its the same lady! She was so awesome last time so I was feeling pretty good. You know the feeling. When you feel you can trust someone because they don't talk over your head with medical jargon, they laugh with you, you can crack a joke or two, they just make you COMFORTABLE.
She gets to measuring and makes sure to tell us to close our eyes in time (still team GREEN!) so we don't see any body parts we shouldn't, and takes all kinds of good pictures for us. I swear she's obsessed with profiles because she gave us a few of those, I believe. Really great lady about our age. Baby is measuring on target to about a week and a half ahead for some measurements. NOT a bad thing at all. The bigger (and most anyone will understand what I mean when I say this) the baby, the better they fair when it comes to health issues. You don't want a smaller baby to have to deal with some bigger issues. Baby behaved and EVERYTHING so she was able to get her share of the appointment done fairly easily and then stepped out to get the dr and compare the measurements from last time to this time. She left me all goopy just in case the dr wanted to do a few scans of his own. 30 mins passes. No dr.
45 mins passes, still no dr, but Cassie (the tech) checks in and lets us know we haven't been forgotten and that if we need the bathroom or whatever to go for it.
60 mins pass, no dr.
I kid you not, Cassie ended up checking in on us like 3-4 times. Each time apologizing for the wait and letting us know we haven't been forgotten, the dr is just in with another patient. Ok, that's fine I guess. What else can we really do except wait?
90 freaking minutes pass and STILL NO DOCTOR. Ok, this is stupid. First appointment we don't get to talk to the dr because his office staff have their heads in the clouds and aren't thinking of the people who had planned (and made appointments JUST SO they could speak to the dr!), and now we have to wait an HOUR AND A HALF for the dr to NOT show up and talk to us. I understand he's a busy man, but he couldn't even be bothered to tell the nurses how much longer he would be with this other patient. Mind you, its 2 pm. Neither one of us had eaten, we are stuck in a room with no tv or anything like that, no food, and no information. We were pretty pissed off. Luckily Cassie came in and told us since we had been waiting so long, they were going to comp us for our time. We took the cafeteria comp and got some food. OMG it felt so good just to have the friggin food in my hands. I was starting to shake, I was so starved!
We knew that once we got back up to the floor we had just come from that they would probably call us back right away because that's just how it ALWAYS happens. Sure enough, they call us back, but this time they take us to a room and the lpn sets up for the dr to show us something on the computer and tells us he should be in shortly. I'm half way through my pretzel when he FINALLY shows up (like 2:30 or so for crying out loud!!!). He said he had just gotten off the phone with the lady from the hospital and was going to talk to us about what she had found and what Cassie had taken photos of.
Basically, no NEW news. Which is a good thing because its not more bad news, just more of the same, things we had learned from research, or a glimmer of good news. Join me as I recall it.
The hole in the baby's heart puts us in the category of a complete endocardial cushion defect. Pretty big news, but the hole is not big. Still won't heal on its own, but its not like I had pictured in my mind. Surgery is still needed, but if we keep on this track (its too soon to tell one way or the other, we are cautiously hopeful), we won't need surgery right away. We will keep up with our monthly visits with this dr so he can keep monitoring the progress that is or isn't being made. We are encouraged to keep up our regular appointments in Little Falls (THANK GOD ABOVE!!) and its looking hopeful (keep that word in mind, its HOPEFUL) that we can deliver on our own (Go into labor on naturally) in Little Falls (same hospital and dr we had for Anthony, GREAT dr and nurses!) and quite possibly be able to go home in a reasonable time frame without extra equipment (ie, oxygen, monitors, etc). Of course this is ALL depending on what we see at weeks 32 and 36. We can't make any for sure plans and have to keep it in our minds that delivering in the Cities still could happen. Nothing is for sure either way right now.
They are looking at the possibility that there could be underlying issues that we just can't see yet. There is also still a chance that the baby has downs (which carries certain health risks too), but we can't be sure until baby is here. With downs, there is a chance for bowel problems (obstructions around the duodenum, fixable with a fairly simple surgery) and the fluid around the lungs needs to be monitored too just in case it could lead to issues with baby's lungs. Again, too soon to tell.
But a fair amount of news that left us feeling a small weight lifting. We had some answers and some answers for now (we'll have to revisit some questions, obviously), but nothing was really upsetting. We were warned that baby very well might end up being born small (babies with heart problems typically are), and that is a big reason as to why they are going to try and let us get to full term and go into labor on our own, as long as there is NO risk to the baby. Heaven forbid they see ANY risk to the baby, its time to take the baby before I would go into labor on my own. Obviously the bigger the baby, the better they do on the outside, so that's why they are going to let us go as long as its safe. That was comforting, since I was having fears that they would have to FOR SURE take the baby sooner (our OB thought they could possibly take the baby 1-2 weeks early) or that I would FOR SURE have to be induced.
Now, it might seem that we are being left to hang in the wind, but we really aren't. The defect is still there, nothing has really changed, we just got more info and some things got cleared up for us. We had basically started to accept the worst case scenario where I would have to deliver early in the Cities, surgery very well could be right away, I'd be induced, baby would be sick from the start (low pulse Oxygen numbers) and I would have to stay down in the Cities for at least a week, spending time away from family and ESPECIALLY my boys. But now we have more possibilities reopened for us. We don't know anything for sure and won't for about 8 weeks or so, but at least we have been reassured that so far, so good. No changes that put anyone on alert YET. There's still time for things to pop up for us, but for now, all is good. Baby looks healthy, moves a lot, and is measuring just where we want.
Now we just need to hear from that pediatric cardiologist Dr Chip. Pray he calls tomorrow when Adam gets home. I'd really like to have Adam here so we can all talk together.
I'll update more on the pregnancy and Anthony in the next post. For now, I'm going to go chill on the couch for a little bit. Please keep praying and take heart, I think that its working in the sense that we have NO MORE BAD NEWS for now. I do feel I can let loose a few happy tears.
Thank you, God. We appreciate your gift and don't take for granted its size. We are thankful for no bad news and a glimmer of cautious hope. We pray that you keep your hands on our family and keep them all safe and healthy. We also pray for more progress and no more health issues with the baby. As for the other things I pray for, I continue praying. I won't say it here, but you know what I ask for in my heart. I pray it all in your name and give MANY thanks to you!
Amen! Hallelujah!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)